Author: Taylor

Shifting Shadows

Shifting shadows can mean a lot of things, but the way I take it shows a part of my life. I’m not perfect, no one is. Everyone struggles with something in their life. I struggle with anxiety, and I used to be depressed. Thankfully, my depression has improved considerably this summer.

To me, shifting shadows are the bad thoughts and events that have occurred in my life. It was as if they always hunted me down. I tried to hide, but they always found me. I never wanted to give up, but I felt like I was going to. I had a therapist and when I talked to her, they would hide, but not for long. When I got home; they came after me again. Like a predator hunting its prey, and I was the prey. My thoughts would tear me down and take me deep inside my mind, the one place I didn’t want to be. No one wants to be there.

I tried to escape many times, but those awful thoughts always came back. It was an endless loop. If some didn’t bother me anymore, others would come. It was a constant battle of the mind.

Eventually, it started going away. After I got saved at church, my depression started gradually declining. Eventually I started paying more attention in church, and this past summer everything was going great for me. I gained the will to quit basketball, which lifted an immense weight off of my shoulders. I started hanging out with an old friend again and we both got saved in our church. We are inseparable now. I pray that I never lose her friendship. My sophomore year only started a few weeks ago, but I’m having a fantastic school time so far.

I am making more friends, and my classes aren’t that bad. I am happy in my life right now and I never want it to end. I thank God for His blessings and I thank Him for this beautiful life that I love. Even though I have struggled so much, He has always been here, right beside me through everything. Look at me now. This feels like one of the best years of my life, even when there is some crazy pandemic happening.

I feel like nothing can take this year away from me. I have had so many people help me through this, too. My family and friends have helped more than they could ever understand.

I want to give a small nod to my friend, Hannah. I don’t want to get all mushy here, but she really helped when she started hanging out with me more. She has made a big impact on my life, and I doubt she realizes it. Thank you so much, Hannah.

That is my story of how, no matter what attacks you, God can always help. You just have to go to Him. Do not pull away. He will always be there for you. He always has for me, by lifting those shifting shadows I struggled with.

Sisterly Love

I’ve written about several people in my life, but not about my sister. She is a precious person in my life. If I did not have her, I probably wouldn’t be me. To be honest, I feel like there are many things that I have learned from her and didn’t notice. She has been a steady influence on my life. She was there when I felt like I couldn’t talk to anyone else. She helps me when I’m in a predicament, and she will even tidy my room when I have someone coming over. She plays a much bigger part in my life than I thought.

Just because we are sisters does not mean that we always get along. We fight, argue, and bicker at each other constantly. That doesn’t mean we aren’t close, though. When you have a sibling, no matter how far apart or different you are, you always have a close connection.

My way of showing love is by teasing. If I don’t mess around with you, then something’s not right. I don’t hug my sister a lot, but she is the one I tease the most. I mess with her constantly. I bug her when she wants to be alone; push her over the edge when she’s mad, and I call her names when she does something dumb. That just means that I love her uncontrollably.

We used to play with barbies and little figurines all the time. Not that she wanted to, but I had mama make her. I always wanted to play with her and we played one of the most common little kid games named family. I always wanted to be the mother. We also played a game called school a lot. We always took turns being the teacher, but I think she was it more though.

As we got older, she stopped hanging out and playing with me as much, and it made me really sad. She is only a year and a half older than me, but when she started acting more like a teenager, it kind of got to me. I felt like she didn’t want to do anything with me. It still feels like that, but I understand more now since we are both teenagers and like to do our own things.

I know she will always be here for me. I hope she knows I will always have her back, too. I will fight or stand up to anyone for her. If you try to stop me, you are out of luck. I remember kids that were older than me picking on her, and I would put myself right out there for her. I did not care one bit that they were older and bigger than me. I love my sister and always will. She is my best friend.

This is her senior year in high school, and it saddens me to know that I only have one more year to spend with her. I know it will feel really different without her. She stays in the room right across from mine and after she leaves, it’s going to feel very lonely up here on the 2nd floor of our home. We are the only ones with a room upstairs and I’m going to miss just popping in on her while she was having “alone time”, or us raiding the fridge and cabinets for food at midnight. Most of all, I’m just going to miss her. She really means a lot to me. I know it’s going to feel like a part of me is missing. I hope she has fun before she goes off to start her own journey. I love you sis, forever and always.

Best Friends…By Taylor

I made a couple of best friends this summer. I don’t really have a lot of friends, and I have been praying to God to help me find a decent, true, and genuine, Christian friend. Now, I think I have found two! One is Hannah. I have known her for quite some time. Our moms are best friends, and they once went to a work-related party. They brought both of us to it, and that is how we met. At first, we didn’t talk at all. Then, maybe thirty or forty minutes later, we started talking to each other. We were running around and having a blast with each other before I realized it.

I think the next time we saw each other was at our church. Afterwards we went to eat at a restaurant together. We had a great time and pleaded with our parents for a sleepover together. They said not right then, but maybe another day. Later on, we met with them again and had a sleepover at my house. We had a great time! I loved hanging out with her, so I invited her for another sleepover on my birthday. Let me tell you guys, she loves to play Mario Kart. It was late; I was tired, and she still wanted to play. I enjoyed playing it with her, though. It was fun. It’s kind of our thing at my house.

Not too long after, we stopped talking to each other and lost touch again. I am very shy, so when I saw her at church, I was nervous about reconnecting. Most of the time I never know what to say, but I really wanted to hang out and continue talking. I’m not sure why we didn’t. We finally got back together after a long time away from each other and I stayed at her house, but yet we drifted apart again.

We finally got together after watching some kids together at church. This only happened a few weeks ago and now we are best friends. I’m not sure how to put it, but I believe this is the closest we’ve ever been since we met. Last week we spent almost the entire time together. One day we went to the pool, and she spent the night at my house. Then I joined her at church and stayed at her house for a night or two. I went home for a day and then to the lake the next day, and I stayed at her place once again. Because I had never seen the entire film before, we watched the movie Titanic. We had a great time, and I loved us hanging out.

 I’m thrilled, and to be honest, this is the happiest I’ve felt in a long time. It’s nice to have someone who will call me as soon as I wake up and talk to me all day when I’m bored. She will tell me something big that happened to her and trust me to keep it a secret. We tease each other and annoy one another for fun. Hannah has become one of my closest friends, and I hope we never lose touch.

Katie is my other friend, whom I met for the first time a few weeks ago. She is awesome! I’ve only hung out with her twice, but she is pretty cool. She is really nice and welcoming. The first time we met I was too shy to talk, but she didn’t care and invited me to join in whatever she was doing. She made me feel confident in being myself. Just yesterday we talked on the phone for almost four and a half hours! We watched a movie together while on the phone, which is funny to think about. I may not fully know Katie, but I would consider her a very close friend. I would also like to point out that she is one hard worker.

I love you, Hannah, and Katie. I hope we don’t drift apart.

An Ode To My Dad

                             An Ode To My Dad on Father’s Day

I have the best dad I could ever ask for. He always tries his best to make me smile or laugh. He cracks his dad jokes seven days a week. Even if I get upset or frustrated at him, he acts goofy, tickles me, or tries to joke around to lighten the mood.

Lately he has been calling my sister and me squirrels, instead of girls. He acts like it’s a slip of the tongue, even though we know it’s not. Even small things like that can make me smile. One of my favorite traits of his is his dad’s humor.

My dad always tries to spend time with everyone. He spends time outside with mama usually, and he likes to watch movies or T.V. shows with my sister and I. Recently, we watched “America’s Got Talent” and “American Ninja Warrior”. He also started watching the “Lord of the Ring” series with my sister. I was in the room, but I was not really into it. One of the characters freaked me out in the second movie.

Dad also watches me play a video game I like every once in a while. Once, he played while I was teaching him. It was pretty funny. I told him I wanted to teach him again soon. I think it would be so much fun if we played together.

Another bond I share with my dad is basketball. Even though I do not play for my school anymore, we still shoot some hoops outside in the driveway. I just got a new basketball goal for Christmas and still love it. No matter how much he loves me playing basketball, he still supported my decision. I love to play the game “horse” with him outside. It is a fun basketball game to play. 

He always tries to help and comfort everyone. No matter how many problems he has on his mind, he puts them aside and helps others. I want him to know that he can come to me if he ever wants to talk. I know I am the kid, but I can always help.

I love you, dad and nothing will ever change that. You are fantastic, super, and amazing. I will always be here for you, as you are for me. I love and miss you the most, no backsies squirrel… I mean dad! You guys might not know what that means because it’s a family thing.


A Letter To My Grandpa

This letter is for my Grandpa Hale, who passed away in 2018:

 Nobody is perfect, but you were great. You always tried to make us kids happy. Some of my most memorable moments with you were when you would randomly ask me about math problems. We wouldn’t get to your house until around midnight sometimes, but you still gave me numbers to work through, and I solved them. You were so impressed by my quick solving mind that you began teaching me how to play sudoku. It was hard at first, but I got the hang of it and loved it. It was a fun numbers game. Numbers were one of my main bonds with you, Grandpa. 

Something else I did with you, along with my sister, was the TV show called Chopped. You started a” Family Chopped”. I don’t know if my readers have watched that cooking show, but basically it is about judging different people’s food and eliminating the contestants until only the best is left. Grandpa, you would give my sister and I a main course of food, and we had to make a meal using it with our own choice of a side dish. We did it for three years. It was a lot of fun. I used to watch that show all the time, so it was cool to feel like I was in it. We had so much fun at your house, it felt like another home. I was always cozy and comfortable there. 

You always tried to give my sister and me money. You would give us math problems, riddles, etc. My great- grandfather, Grandio, does the same. I will not lie, it is fun getting money by doing challenges. On Christmas, or my birthday, you also gave us money and always asked us later what we did with it. Sometimes I saved it. Other times I spent it quickly. You always tried to give us an extra helping hand. 

Another game you taught me was chess. I wanted to know how to play, and everyone told me that you were great at it. I then went to you and asked to play. you showed me what each piece did and then we played a match or two. Let me tell you that my family was not lying when they talked about how good you are. I cannot remember if I’ve ever beaten you, I might have once, but it would not surprise me that you let me win.  

I remember you would come and stay with us at Christmas sometimes and that was awesome! One year you gave me my first chess board, and we played on it together. I had bunches of fun with you while you were with us. I would go outside and sit with you in the garage, and we played hangman, or just hang out, or just talk. We did the same at your house under the car cover in front of your garage. You always had Life Savers there too. 

I want my mom to pay close attention to this part. I want her to know that when she struggles and misses you; she does not have to hide it. I want her to come to me. I do not want her to feel sad, or alone. I want her to know that I miss you dearly too, grandpa, and she can come to me and talk about it. She can cry and laugh with me over the memories we have of you. When Mom is sad, I go to her and if she does not want me around, then I will pull this story up on my phone and hand it to her. No matter what, I will try to comfort her when she is alone. I do not want Mom to be sad, and I hope I can help her stay on the positive side of things. I love you, mama and I will always be here for you. 

I hope you see this in Heaven, Grandpa. I hope you can be here with all of us. Lord, please lay a hand on my mom, all my aunts, Grandio, Mamaw, and the rest of my family. I love you Grandpa ❤…Taylor