Burnt Toast

   As I sat in my favorite chair in our sunroom, I was mesmerized by the dance of dust particles in a shaft of sunlight streaming through the windows. The colorful bluish rug beneath embraced the floor, creating a cozy atmosphere. In that moment of tranquility, a thought occurred to me: peace is joy at rest, and joy is peace on steroids.

With age comes the realization that life is shorter than we once believed. As a young boy, I stood at the beginning of a journey that would take me to many places, introduce me to wonderful people, and offer countless exciting experiences. Looking back, I’ve embraced the “Burnt Toast Theory” – the belief that there’s always a reason behind life’s events, even if it’s not immediately apparent.

This perspective has been a constant companion, allowing me to maintain a positive outlook despite life’s challenges. I recognize that my perpetual optimism can sometimes grate on family and friends. It’s a trait I inherited from my childhood experiences, particularly my efforts to cheer up my sad mother in the face of my father’s struggles with alcohol.

The “Burnt Toast Theory” has been my anchor through turbulent times. When life feels like a blender with the top off, spreading chaos everywhere, this philosophy helps me restore a sense of order and sanity. I’ve noticed this mindset in several friends who unknowingly subscribe to the same outlook.

Turning 50 marked a significant shift in my life. It wasn’t just a new chapter; it felt like starting a new book. While there have been moments of sadness, they’re vastly outweighed by the abundance of goodness. The challenging times are tucked away in a seldom-visited corner of my mind. One of the perks of aging is the feeling that every fifteen minutes brings a new opportunity for “breakfast” – a fresh start or a moment of joy.

I’m acutely aware that at my age, the glass of life is more than half empty. Yet, I imagine death as simply falling asleep on the living room floor and waking up in my own bed – a peaceful transition to whatever comes next.

My wife and I frequently embark on trips in our quest to live an interesting and positive life. Recently, we journeyed to Lumberton, NC, to visit our old friends (Don and Louise), followed by a stop at Kill Devil Hill in Nags Head, NC, to visit some more old friends (Mary Beth and John). These visits have become the focus of our travels, bringing warmth to our hearts.

A highlight of our recent trip was the opportunity to use the full-service driving feature of our new Tesla Model S, which we’ve aptly named the “Starship.” Its yoke steering wheel and 17-inch screen filled with icons make it feel genuinely futuristic. Each time I get into the car, I feel like picking up a microphone and saying, “Tower, this is Starship, requesting permission to take off!” 😊

Over the 700-mile round trip, I controlled the steering for less than a mile, mostly in unmarked parking lots or driveways. Despite cruising at 75 mph on the interstate, we never felt unsafe. While I remain vigilant, unwilling to fully trust the autopilot, I’m amazed by its capabilities.

Upon our return, I eagerly shared our adventures with one of my neighbors. However, our conversation took a sad turn when he revealed that his wife had been hospitalized the night before, teetering on the brink of death. The contrast between my joyful recounting and his heart-wrenching experience was stark. Thankfully, his prayers were answered, and his wife’s condition has dramatically improved.

As I watched him walk away after our conversation, I felt a pang of guilt for sharing my incredible adventure while he was grappling with such profound sadness. He and his wife remain in our prayers, as they have been for some time. It’s challenging to witness friends struggle, especially when they live next door. Their courage in facing life’s challenges together serves as a constant inspiration.

Helen Keller once said, “Love is like a beautiful flower which I may not touch, but whose fragrance makes the garden a place of delight just the same.” This sentiment resonates deeply with me, encapsulating the beauty and complexity of human relationships and experiences.

Life’s myriad ups and downs continue to teach me valuable lessons. The dust particles dancing in the sunlight serve as a metaphor for the fleeting nature of our existence – beautiful, ephemeral, and worthy of appreciation. As I navigate the latter chapters of my life, I strive to maintain my positive outlook while remaining sensitive to the struggles of those around me.

The “Burnt Toast Theory” continues to guide me, reminding me to seek meaning and purpose in every joyful or challenging experience. It’s a philosophy that has served me well, helping me find balance and perspective in an often chaotic world.

Reflecting on my journey, I’m grateful for the people I’ve met, the places I’ve seen, and the lessons I’ve learned. While the glass of life may be more than half empty, I focus on the richness of what remains—the relationships, the memories, and the opportunities to positively impact those around me.

Ultimately, it’s not about the length of our journey but the quality of our experiences and the depth of our connections. Whether we’re marveling at the wonders of technology in a “Starship” car or offering a comforting presence to a neighbor in need, each moment is an opportunity to embrace life fully and spread a little more joy in the world.

As I continue to write the pages of my new book of life, I remain committed to finding the silver lining in every cloud, appreciating the beauty in everyday moments, and cherishing the connections that make life truly meaningful. After all, in the grand tapestry of existence, these threads of love, compassion, and shared experiences create the most vibrant and enduring patterns.