Tag: love


One-on-One Time


I am a huge advocate that parents need to spend occasional one-on-one time with each of their children. From the time they are young, during their teen years, and after they are adults.

I have three grown daughters. This year, their ages will be 39, 37, and 30. I love my daughters more than life itself. Being their mother has been an essential part of my life and has been the reason for the most joyful times I have known.

With everyone having their own life to live, it becomes a real challenge to have one-on-one time with an adult child. A genuine effort has to be made by both parties. It was easy to keep up with each other’s daily routines, good days, and bad days while living under the same roof. But when the chicks begin to fly and leave the nest for their own, the busyness of life and the world’s stresses have a way of pulling loved ones apart. We have to try harder!

Lately, I have felt an authentic, heartfelt need to connect with each of my girls. They each seem so busy with meaningful projects in their lives that I have not had the heart to ask for their time. One of the worst feelings in the world for a parent is to feel like a burden on our children. I felt as if it would be very selfish of me to do so.

Sometimes life just has a way of working things out for us. I have been in desperate need of help with cleaning and organizing my apartment. It was built in 1970 and requires some major repairs. Repairs that will require me to move out for at least a whole week. I will also have to take my belongings with me so the floors can be replaced entirely.

I can no longer do things, like cleaning fast and furious, as I did in my younger years. Much less move furniture around. I knew I needed help, but I became silent in asking, hoping, and praying it would somehow all workout.

And it did. My beautiful Chelsea, my sweet baby girl, saw I needed help and came to my rescue. Like a little angel with the power of a tornado, she came into my home and got more done in a matter of days than I could have done in one year! She amazed me, and she also took a burden from me that was so heavy.

I never asked Chelsea for her help. She offered. Somehow, someway, my youngest daughter grew into a kind, loving, generous, and empathetic adult. I couldn’t be more proud of her. I doubt she realizes just how much her help means to me. She probably won’t be able to until someday, when she is older and in the same need for help. That is how life lessons work.

But that was not the only blessing to come out of this story. My daughter and I ended up spending much-needed and valuable one-on-one time. It had been way too long. Yes, we were sweating, and yes, we were doing not-so-pleasant chores, but the magic happened anyway. We laughed, cried, hugged, and were able to catch up on each other’s lives.

When Chelsea walked away, I was left with a clean apartment, organized rooms, and a heart full of love for my youngest. I felt revived, renewed, and ready to face Spring with a happy attitude.

Chelsea plans to return this weekend and help me finish a few loose ends. I can’t wait to see her. Not just for the help, which I am very grateful for, but for the one-on-one time we will be spending with each other again.

Now to find a way to spend some overdue one-on-one time with my other two daughters. It will be a challenge, but no doubt it will be worth it.


Shifting Shadows


Shifting shadows can mean a lot of things, but the way I take it shows a part of my life. I’m not perfect, no one is. Everyone struggles with something in their life. I struggle with anxiety, and I used to be depressed. Thankfully, my depression has improved considerably this summer.

To me, shifting shadows are the bad thoughts and events that have occurred in my life. It was as if they always hunted me down. I tried to hide, but they always found me. I never wanted to give up, but I felt like I was going to. I had a therapist and when I talked to her, they would hide, but not for long. When I got home; they came after me again. Like a predator hunting its prey, and I was the prey. My thoughts would tear me down and take me deep inside my mind, the one place I didn’t want to be. No one wants to be there.

I tried to escape many times, but those awful thoughts always came back. It was an endless loop. If some didn’t bother me anymore, others would come. It was a constant battle of the mind.

Eventually, it started going away. After I got saved at church, my depression started gradually declining. Eventually I started paying more attention in church, and this past summer everything was going great for me. I gained the will to quit basketball, which lifted an immense weight off of my shoulders. I started hanging out with an old friend again and we both got saved in our church. We are inseparable now. I pray that I never lose her friendship. My sophomore year only started a few weeks ago, but I’m having a fantastic school time so far.

I am making more friends, and my classes aren’t that bad. I am happy in my life right now and I never want it to end. I thank God for His blessings and I thank Him for this beautiful life that I love. Even though I have struggled so much, He has always been here, right beside me through everything. Look at me now. This feels like one of the best years of my life, even when there is some crazy pandemic happening.

I feel like nothing can take this year away from me. I have had so many people help me through this, too. My family and friends have helped more than they could ever understand.

I want to give a small nod to my friend, Hannah. I don’t want to get all mushy here, but she really helped when she started hanging out with me more. She has made a big impact on my life, and I doubt she realizes it. Thank you so much, Hannah.

That is my story of how, no matter what attacks you, God can always help. You just have to go to Him. Do not pull away. He will always be there for you. He always has for me, by lifting those shifting shadows I struggled with.


Sisterly Love


I’ve written about several people in my life, but not about my sister. She is a precious person in my life. If I did not have her, I probably wouldn’t be me. To be honest, I feel like there are many things that I have learned from her and didn’t notice. She has been a steady influence on my life. She was there when I felt like I couldn’t talk to anyone else. She helps me when I’m in a predicament, and she will even tidy my room when I have someone coming over. She plays a much bigger part in my life than I thought.

Just because we are sisters does not mean that we always get along. We fight, argue, and bicker at each other constantly. That doesn’t mean we aren’t close, though. When you have a sibling, no matter how far apart or different you are, you always have a close connection.

My way of showing love is by teasing. If I don’t mess around with you, then something’s not right. I don’t hug my sister a lot, but she is the one I tease the most. I mess with her constantly. I bug her when she wants to be alone; push her over the edge when she’s mad, and I call her names when she does something dumb. That just means that I love her uncontrollably.

We used to play with barbies and little figurines all the time. Not that she wanted to, but I had mama make her. I always wanted to play with her and we played one of the most common little kid games named family. I always wanted to be the mother. We also played a game called school a lot. We always took turns being the teacher, but I think she was it more though.

As we got older, she stopped hanging out and playing with me as much, and it made me really sad. She is only a year and a half older than me, but when she started acting more like a teenager, it kind of got to me. I felt like she didn’t want to do anything with me. It still feels like that, but I understand more now since we are both teenagers and like to do our own things.

I know she will always be here for me. I hope she knows I will always have her back, too. I will fight or stand up to anyone for her. If you try to stop me, you are out of luck. I remember kids that were older than me picking on her, and I would put myself right out there for her. I did not care one bit that they were older and bigger than me. I love my sister and always will. She is my best friend.

This is her senior year in high school, and it saddens me to know that I only have one more year to spend with her. I know it will feel really different without her. She stays in the room right across from mine and after she leaves, it’s going to feel very lonely up here on the 2nd floor of our home. We are the only ones with a room upstairs and I’m going to miss just popping in on her while she was having “alone time”, or us raiding the fridge and cabinets for food at midnight. Most of all, I’m just going to miss her. She really means a lot to me. I know it’s going to feel like a part of me is missing. I hope she has fun before she goes off to start her own journey. I love you sis, forever and always.


World’s Best Mom


This is dedicated to my Mama. My Mama is very special to me. She has helped me
through so much in my life while helping others at the same time. People go to
her when they need help because she is very easy to talk to about personal
problems. She always knows what to say, that is why I go to her all the time. For
example, when I broke down and had a panic attack because I was so upset by
basketball, I went to her. I was so sad, but after she wrapped her arms around me
tight and talked to me in her soothing and comforting tone, I knew I was okay. She
prays over me when I’m anxious and sad. She picks me up when I’m down. I don’t
know what I would do without her.
She means the world to me. I know every kid says to their mom that she is the
best in the whole wide world, but Mama, “You are the best in the whole wide
world!” I mean it with all my heart and no other kid can mean it as much as me! I
love you, and I want to help you like you help me. When you are down and trip
over a stump, I want to help pick you up like you do me. When you are scared and
see a pot hole ahead of you on the road, I want to help you move around it like
you do me. I want to be someone that you can talk to and get help from like you are
for me.
No one can replace you Mama. Know that that will never change! I love you and
always will no matter what! Never forget that! You mean the world to me. You try
to make me happy even if it causes you trouble.
I appreciate you and everything you do. You fight for this family, and you fight for
me. You try your best to get me where I need to be, get my two siblings where
they need to be, and get yourself where you need to be. I do not know how you
do it but you do.
I for one am proud of you. Might I just say that I am a fan of your work. Also….
just so you know… I love and miss you the most, no backsies.
P.S. Many of you reading this will not know what that means in my family.


I Love You!…by JoAnn


How often do you hear the words “I love you”?  

If you are in a romantic relationship, you probably hear those words daily.  Young love, or what feels like young love, seems to bring out, “I love you” with ease.  It’s when we are most expressive. It’s timely and fitting for the romance at the moment.   

If you have been married for many years, you may rarely hear I love you.  Lol, the well-known “honeymoon stage” has long since passed and has been filled with kids, bills, and a lot of hard work.  It’s not that the love is gone, there just doesn’t seem to be a reason to speak it verbally anymore.  After all, you made a lifelong commitment to your spouse, and you are still there. So, you love them. Why say it?  Naturally, I am making light of a quandary many couples fall into.    

If you are a single parent, hearing “I love you” from a significant other may be just a memory.  You may however draw energy from those three brief words each time they cross your child’s lips.  A child can quickly soften the stress from a long, hard day by saying I love you at bedtime.

But what if you live alone and there’s no one to utter those precious words?  I have lived alone for many years and my children are grown with families of their own.  There is no “significant other” in my life, so I have gotten used to going days, or even weeks, without hearing someone’s voice say, ever so sweetly, “I love you”.  When I hear those words, they mean a lot more to me now and I no longer take them for granted.  

I know the importance of saying those words better now.  When I tell one of my grandchildren, “I love you”, I want those words to stay in their hearts forever.  I know they will need to hold on to that love in tough times.  I want them to always know that love is there for them, no matter what.  Just as I did with my children.

Yes, there are many ways to show love and they are just as important as saying it.  But this missive is about verbalizing the actual words.  There is something to be said for someone opening up their heart, letting go of their inhibitions, and speaking words of affirmation.  To hear the words out loud has a healing affect, whether it be on a child, a friend, a parent, a spouse, or a partner.  Hearing “I love” you can open a door to forgiveness, feelings of self-worth, and relieve many anxieties in life.  

So, how long has it been since you told someone you love them?  Never underestimate the power of saying it and never miss an opportunity to do so. I believe this quote expresses it perfectly: “Time is like a river.  You cannot touch the same water twice, because the flow that has passed will never pass again.”… unknown


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